How many personas do you have? While we are not entirely aware of how many personas we embody throughout our lives, becoming aware that we do can help us obtain inner peace.
Have you paid close attention to the way you behave in front of your mom or your friends? And how that may be entirely different than the way you act in front of your partner. Think about how you behave in front of your boss or colleagues. Doesn’t your behavior change depending on who is observing you? This means that when we interact with different people, we are changing the masks (persona) and altering our real personality.
This behavior creates a tremendous amount of dissonance. Why? Because it takes an enormous amount of energy to keep up the appearance of being someone you are not. Not only that, but now you have to be on guard, making sure the mask will not be taken off by someone. So you never experience inner peace.
Social media is an excellent example of how we selectively curate our photos to demonstrate our social status. I am guilty of the act, along with many other people, this indicates how focused we are on appearances and superficiality. We fail to go beyond the first layer of who we are. Our identity becomes attached to our physical appearance or the entity we created, and we begin searching for validation from others to feel satisfied.
I experienced crippling moments when my ego was so wrapped around the image of being perfect, that I was afraid to go outside without makeup or my hair being done. I attached my beauty to these two physical features and in order for me to feel beautiful I had to fix myself up. The conflict between my natural self and the created persona became so unbearable, I began to challenge myself. I would go to work without a drop of makeup and with my wild curly hair. At first people asked my if I was sick or tired, ( I have dark circles under my eyes) with time they stopped asking questions. And I realized that it was more work to keep the mask on then to feel vulnerable.
Becoming aware is the first step to gaining control of our emotions. Attention is an expression of love, and we seek it in all areas of our lives. We mold ourselves to be who we believe should be loved. Where are you experiencing a shortage of love? But, this conditioning began before we had any understanding. It was a way our parents or guardians thought they could control our behavior. We were rewarded for our good acts and punished for the bad ones. The more we complied, the more attention we received our vice versa.
I encourage you to search for the reasons you have different personas. Who knows, you might find your true self.